Ernie Thayer

Is it possible to see through myself? Can my sense of being someone with all my hopes, dreams, motives, habits, conditioning and behaviors be seen through? Can there just be an awareness of it all without any reason for it, only because it is there to see? And what is visible when looking through all that. And what’s looking?

I’m trying to describe our innate perception simply shining on all this ‘stuff’ we have become so identified with. Innate because it’s part of us, part of what it means to be alive, human – there is this inborn capacity to see. It is there even before we learn to wrap around it a sense of being someone separate from others and even from nature, i.e., before all the trouble starts.

Can perception be free of the wrapper? Can it see through all that and be aware of itself in its native, unconditioned state. Is the wrapper essential?

There is immense freedom in this. Seen through, nothing of my self has any great significance – not the things or skills I don’t yet have, not the mistakes I’ve made, not the dreams unfulfilled, not my attachments to things, people or states of being. All that is in the field of view but it is perception that is central, not “me” and my gyrations.

Such perception lacks nothing, desires nothing. It simply is. Just light shining, exposing everything. Then “I” am transparent.

Can one live there? What might that be like? What will happen to “me”?

Please experiment with this. You could start by watching yourself in all your daily activities, seeing your motives, noticing what you think and how you feel in relationship to everyone and everything. Watch deeply and you will catch sight of how you actually work, being you. Don’t get caught up in self-judgment, or in trying to accomplish anything, but only notice if that happens. Remain curious to see what is true about you. Shine light. There’s a lot to see…

There’s a flower here. Stick your nose in it and breathe.